Hello. I've missed you.
Not actually, but in any case...
So I'm paying to go to college for music. My parents are paying for me to go to college for music, rather... or if you want to go that far- my father's employer is pretty much making sure I turn into a well rounded musician. And why?
There are a few things about music school that have flustered me over the short experience I've had here. Don't get me wrong, most of it is absolutely fantastic and I've learned so much- but I always wonder if I'm getting something here that it would be impossible to get somewhere outside of higher education. One main thing that has been on my mind is that every musician is different. On the academic level it is agreed that every musician is different and you have to find your own path. Unfortunately this is not paralleled by the curriculum. We are all funneled into one standardized system for a "well rounded musician." In my particular situation half of us classical, the other half jazz. If I were a person that wanted to do exactly what the program was gearing me towards I would not have a problem with it, but alas I'm talking about it and that's not the case. I'm a very commercial oriented musician at this point in my life and the classical world is getting more interesting and less appealing as time goes on. I love it and can appreciate it more than I ever could in the past, and I wouldn't subject my worst enemy to some of the extremist conservative views that seem to dominate the market. Being in the classical program, and nearly locked in at this point- makes me a little... uncomfortable.
I still have plenty to learn, specifically in the jazz style and theory areas. This semester I went out on a limb and am taking some courses on that side and I'm learning more than I am in any other course- and I'm getting zero credit toward graduating. It seems as though there is a problem when you are learning the most useful information in college during classes that nobody even suggested you take. [as an aside I've been told that people learn the most in this situation because it's the only time you're there simply because you want to learn and not even an ounce because you have to be, so perhaps if in an alternate reality it were required- I might not be learning as much... so there's that]
So is it worth it is the question at the end of every day...
In my humble opinion- the goal of music school is to get somebody's playing abilities great enough to be able to perform in the world proficiently. I've had to turn down performance opportunities a few times (and counting) because I have classes. It seems to me that these opportunities are the most important part of a young musician's career and it is very disconcerting to deem academic work simply more important.
In my experiences so far, it is indeed worth it. Again... For me, it is worth it. The problem is that I honestly don't think most of the people around me are getting enough out of it for it to be worth it for them, and are wasting their time and or money. It's not saying they're not good enough or talented enough, it's just saying that they could be using their time and money more effectively elsewhere (and definitely some are not good enough or talented enough :-P)
So this is kind of my first installment of "Is It Bullshit?! A Practical Approach To Investing Massive Amounts of Money With Absolutely No Guaranteed Return"
-Christopher B
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Nothing Exists
I always wondered why I act in such a manic way. Constantly jumping topics, adding cynical remarks, saying stupid things, interjecting anything off the wall, ferociously arguing politics, and mediating these spurts of activity with long silent listening sessions. There is no particular reason why I act the way that I do, or at least I thought.
I recently came to the realization that nothing exists. It started with one of Zeno's paradoxes: the one that shows that movement is impossible. Here goes: To get from point a to a second point, point b, an object has to get to point c, where point c is half way in between point a and point b. But to get to point c, one has to get to point d, which is half way in between point a and point c. And so on and so on to infinity. It follows that for anything to move, it has to cross an infinite amount of points in space. This is impossible, therefore nothing is able to move. That's messed up.
But what does that mean? It means that what we can perceive is an illusion. I let that one stew for awhile. Then I read the end of Plato's dialogue, the Parmenides. It is an argument that concludes with the statement that "if the one is not, nothing is." From the best I can tell, the argument has no flaws. This is odd, it means if everything is not ultimately one thing without differentiation, then nothing exists. Incidentally, everything being one thing is impossible, at least in my view.
Let's come at it in another way, For the materialist, I suppose I'm still a materialist in some sense, all that exists is matter, energy, and nothingness. That seems right, there is absolutely no real proof for immaterial entities except nothingness itself. But, what is matter? It's frozen energy. What is the big bang? A lot of energy moving from a massive and un-caused explosion of space and time. All that really exists, then, is energy: a giant mistake of cosmic imbalance. The universe is a big mistake, it's a negatively charged void. Nothing, ultimately, exists.
But what does this mean for us? We don't exist, nothing that we know as our loved ones exist, nothing we know exists. Is that disturbing? I used to think so, but I've come to reject that conclusion. What is more special than being able to live an illusion that is real? The reason that everything seems the way it is is by an un-caused mistake. That's quite special, in fact, miraculous one might say. A hell of a lot more miraculous than being God's creation. God can kill us at any moment, and create and destroy anything God wants. How boring.
I now know why I act the way I do: I'm afraid if I stop acting the way I do, people will realize that there is nothing to me, that I don't exist. I think I've finally come to accept that conclusion, that I don't exist. What's so wrong with it, to be part of a really messy, imbalanced miracle? Nothing, I think. So here I am, in print on a blog, and I don't exist. That's pretty cool.
Until next time,
Josh
I recently came to the realization that nothing exists. It started with one of Zeno's paradoxes: the one that shows that movement is impossible. Here goes: To get from point a to a second point, point b, an object has to get to point c, where point c is half way in between point a and point b. But to get to point c, one has to get to point d, which is half way in between point a and point c. And so on and so on to infinity. It follows that for anything to move, it has to cross an infinite amount of points in space. This is impossible, therefore nothing is able to move. That's messed up.
But what does that mean? It means that what we can perceive is an illusion. I let that one stew for awhile. Then I read the end of Plato's dialogue, the Parmenides. It is an argument that concludes with the statement that "if the one is not, nothing is." From the best I can tell, the argument has no flaws. This is odd, it means if everything is not ultimately one thing without differentiation, then nothing exists. Incidentally, everything being one thing is impossible, at least in my view.
Let's come at it in another way, For the materialist, I suppose I'm still a materialist in some sense, all that exists is matter, energy, and nothingness. That seems right, there is absolutely no real proof for immaterial entities except nothingness itself. But, what is matter? It's frozen energy. What is the big bang? A lot of energy moving from a massive and un-caused explosion of space and time. All that really exists, then, is energy: a giant mistake of cosmic imbalance. The universe is a big mistake, it's a negatively charged void. Nothing, ultimately, exists.
But what does this mean for us? We don't exist, nothing that we know as our loved ones exist, nothing we know exists. Is that disturbing? I used to think so, but I've come to reject that conclusion. What is more special than being able to live an illusion that is real? The reason that everything seems the way it is is by an un-caused mistake. That's quite special, in fact, miraculous one might say. A hell of a lot more miraculous than being God's creation. God can kill us at any moment, and create and destroy anything God wants. How boring.
I now know why I act the way I do: I'm afraid if I stop acting the way I do, people will realize that there is nothing to me, that I don't exist. I think I've finally come to accept that conclusion, that I don't exist. What's so wrong with it, to be part of a really messy, imbalanced miracle? Nothing, I think. So here I am, in print on a blog, and I don't exist. That's pretty cool.
Until next time,
Josh
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
What are you holding out for?
There's always stuff I really want to do, and I almost never do anything.
I've probably always been this way, but I really started to notice it towards the end of the summer and now at the beginning of the semester as I long for all the free time I wasted. Ever the optimist, I make these monumental plans with my friends going into every summer break and they all nod and humor me but I get the feeling they know better anymore.
We almost never do anything.
I've got the time, and the resources, but lately I've been struggling to stray from the path of least resistance. I get into these routines, and I just won't stray from them for anything that takes any amount of work. Over the summer I really wanted to go out into the woods I used to roam when I was a kid with one of my oldest friends, but since it was a couple degrees warmer than we would've liked we stayed in and played Call of Duty for what would be one of many times.
It's been a really shitty day in the way of weather up here, and I can sit down and play all the duty I want now, but I just don't feel like it. The way I play that game has told me a lot about the way I've been living; I never really get hyped up about playing it or get attached to it, but damn it makes for a decent way to pass an hour. Man do those wasted hours add up though. I have friends who have played so much COD that their playtime is measured in weeks. WEEKS. Now, I'm not quite that bad, but it's still disturbing to think I've probably wasted the equivalent of a few days of my life on an activity I'm not passionate about, I'm not interested in half the time, and I'm not required to do.
I've spent the last year watching my friends graduate, move away, get engaged, switch schools, and just on a whole take massive steps towards the rest of their lives. I'm running out of time with a lot of them; our days as college kids with a world of possibilities are coming to an end and we're all going to have to get real jobs and have real responsibilities awfully soon, so I've really gotta get my ass off the couch and start seeing the people I love and will miss.
What are you holding out for? What's always in the way? If you don't have a damn good answer to either of those questions (I know I don't), I'd advise rethinking how you spend your time. So to those of you who have been a part of one of my crazy half-brained plans that never panned out, be warned. The time has come to write and record that song together, to beat that old video game together, to take that hike in the woods together, to toss a frisbee around together, or to just catch the fuck up finally. I hope I'll be seeing you all relatively soon, and if I don't, I'll be sure it's not for lack of my effort.
-Kevin
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Sleeping At The Wheel
Click & Listen :)
I'm at a real weird place in my life.
Through high school, I knew I was going to college. I didn't know where until the second I decided, but I knew I'd be dorming in the fall of 2010. My first two years of college I floated between majors, constantly telling myself I had time to make up my mind about where I wanted to go and what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. There was no pressure to make a decision, so I just spent the time dabbling in different subjects and knocking out gen eds because hey, I had more than half my college career ahead of me.
And then I didn't. Seemingly all at once, I went from being a freshman taking in everything about the college atmosphere to being a burned out upperclassman panicking about the future at every turn. Suddenly every hour I spend enjoying the company of my friends here is an hour I'm wasting, an hour I should spend figuring out where the hell I'm going. I spent this past weekend foregoing things I would've liked to have done in favor of staring at my computer trying to make sense of all the options in front of me, and I managed to determine that beauty school and the WNBA probably aren't realistic destinations for me. Beyond the internet, the only advice I can seem to get from advisers and people of the sort is to take my time and wait until I stumble on a class or a subject that really interests me and ride that out. They always advocate patience, but my extra years of tuition would help to pay their salaries so it's no wonder they see no problem with me hanging around. I've come to the conclusion that it's time to just take a stab at getting it right on my own, and if the world kicks me in the nuts when I get out there then so be it.
The song I linked above is one of the more beautiful songs I've heard recently, although I may be biased since I'm a total MB20 fanboy. I listened to it for the first time yesterday and was struck by how beautifully the lyrics articulate exactly how I'm feeling. I've been sleeping at the wheel for as long as I can remember; all of my years of schooling I've done nothing but what I'm told academically, and even my extracurriculars were more a result of my desire to spend time with the people in them than my own interest in them. Certainly the song applies to my romantic life as well, but I won't put any of you to sleep with that here; the point is that autopilot just seems to be my nature. But no more.
Come on, come on, I can be saved. I'm done letting people tell me how to act, how to feel, how to live the rest of my life. It's time I take it by the horns and save myself, so that whether I lead a life I love or one I have to tweak to make it suit me, I can never kick myself for letting someone else hold the credit for what I come to accomplish. My hands are full but my life is not, and it's time that changes. I won't spend the rest of my time busying myself all the ways other people say I should with no idea what I'm fighting for; every day is a fresh start, and tomorrow's new beginning for me is going to be a new commitment to self fulfillment and hopefully a forgotten concern regarding what other people want for me.
As always, thanks for reading, and please comment with thoughts on the matter if you have any! I'm sure I'm not the only one having a mid-college crisis in these parts.
-Kevin
I'm at a real weird place in my life.
Through high school, I knew I was going to college. I didn't know where until the second I decided, but I knew I'd be dorming in the fall of 2010. My first two years of college I floated between majors, constantly telling myself I had time to make up my mind about where I wanted to go and what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. There was no pressure to make a decision, so I just spent the time dabbling in different subjects and knocking out gen eds because hey, I had more than half my college career ahead of me.
And then I didn't. Seemingly all at once, I went from being a freshman taking in everything about the college atmosphere to being a burned out upperclassman panicking about the future at every turn. Suddenly every hour I spend enjoying the company of my friends here is an hour I'm wasting, an hour I should spend figuring out where the hell I'm going. I spent this past weekend foregoing things I would've liked to have done in favor of staring at my computer trying to make sense of all the options in front of me, and I managed to determine that beauty school and the WNBA probably aren't realistic destinations for me. Beyond the internet, the only advice I can seem to get from advisers and people of the sort is to take my time and wait until I stumble on a class or a subject that really interests me and ride that out. They always advocate patience, but my extra years of tuition would help to pay their salaries so it's no wonder they see no problem with me hanging around. I've come to the conclusion that it's time to just take a stab at getting it right on my own, and if the world kicks me in the nuts when I get out there then so be it.
The song I linked above is one of the more beautiful songs I've heard recently, although I may be biased since I'm a total MB20 fanboy. I listened to it for the first time yesterday and was struck by how beautifully the lyrics articulate exactly how I'm feeling. I've been sleeping at the wheel for as long as I can remember; all of my years of schooling I've done nothing but what I'm told academically, and even my extracurriculars were more a result of my desire to spend time with the people in them than my own interest in them. Certainly the song applies to my romantic life as well, but I won't put any of you to sleep with that here; the point is that autopilot just seems to be my nature. But no more.
Come on, come on, I can be saved. I'm done letting people tell me how to act, how to feel, how to live the rest of my life. It's time I take it by the horns and save myself, so that whether I lead a life I love or one I have to tweak to make it suit me, I can never kick myself for letting someone else hold the credit for what I come to accomplish. My hands are full but my life is not, and it's time that changes. I won't spend the rest of my time busying myself all the ways other people say I should with no idea what I'm fighting for; every day is a fresh start, and tomorrow's new beginning for me is going to be a new commitment to self fulfillment and hopefully a forgotten concern regarding what other people want for me.
As always, thanks for reading, and please comment with thoughts on the matter if you have any! I'm sure I'm not the only one having a mid-college crisis in these parts.
-Kevin
Monday, August 27, 2012
The Antisocial Network
In the spirit of my promised semi-predictability in post topics, here's a rant straight outta left field. I hate Facebook. I hate it so much that I check it about a dozen times a day, take pictures specifically thinking they'll be the perfect profile pic, and insist on constantly advertising who I'm spending my time with all over your newsfeed. But I really do hate it, and what it's turned us all into.
I got my Facebook my junior year of high school specifically to keep in touch with the friends i made in Italy and with the idea that it'd be useful when I went to college as well. And I suppose it has served these purposes well, along with keeping me in the loop about what my entire graduating class is having for lunch. But it's also helped to nurture a form of socializing that I'm embarrassed to say I take a part in.
The days of compliments are gone. Real wholehearted vocalized compliments are going to be completely foreign to my children, replaced by liking pictures and statuses on Facebook. Or if what's shared is really good, maybe it'll earn a comment that looks like the bastard child of texting shorthand and my phone number ($w33+ p1c!). Regardless, the next generation will probably never know the unsettled feeling that comes right before you approach a girl at a party to tell her how great she looks. Why bother, just like the picture tomorrow when it hits the book.
I can't pretend to be innocent; I like half the pictures that show up in my feed it feels like. But a few weeks ago I had enough and decided to take a step back, no matter how small. I saw someone I've known posted a picture of herself from some formal occasion, and I thought to myself what a nice picture of her it was. As I was about to click the good old like button, I stopped myself. How would that like come across to her? Would she know that I thought it was a great picture of her or would she think I hit like in the midst of a drunken facebooking frenzy? Likely neither; she would've seen the notification and then clicked on another one that required a response. We've all had that compliment that made our day; mine for her would've gotten buried at the bottom of a pile of notifications.
So I texted her. Not as warm or personal as it could've been, but a step up from a digital thumbs up. And it felt good to take control of the message I was sending again, to not leave my 'like' up for her interpretation. I felt good about it and I hope it brightened her day up a bit too. Maybe every picture deserves a text instead of a like, or maybe only some do, but I do at least know you'll all start seeing my name on your phone screens more and on your notifications tab less.
-kevin
I got my Facebook my junior year of high school specifically to keep in touch with the friends i made in Italy and with the idea that it'd be useful when I went to college as well. And I suppose it has served these purposes well, along with keeping me in the loop about what my entire graduating class is having for lunch. But it's also helped to nurture a form of socializing that I'm embarrassed to say I take a part in.
The days of compliments are gone. Real wholehearted vocalized compliments are going to be completely foreign to my children, replaced by liking pictures and statuses on Facebook. Or if what's shared is really good, maybe it'll earn a comment that looks like the bastard child of texting shorthand and my phone number ($w33+ p1c!). Regardless, the next generation will probably never know the unsettled feeling that comes right before you approach a girl at a party to tell her how great she looks. Why bother, just like the picture tomorrow when it hits the book.
I can't pretend to be innocent; I like half the pictures that show up in my feed it feels like. But a few weeks ago I had enough and decided to take a step back, no matter how small. I saw someone I've known posted a picture of herself from some formal occasion, and I thought to myself what a nice picture of her it was. As I was about to click the good old like button, I stopped myself. How would that like come across to her? Would she know that I thought it was a great picture of her or would she think I hit like in the midst of a drunken facebooking frenzy? Likely neither; she would've seen the notification and then clicked on another one that required a response. We've all had that compliment that made our day; mine for her would've gotten buried at the bottom of a pile of notifications.
So I texted her. Not as warm or personal as it could've been, but a step up from a digital thumbs up. And it felt good to take control of the message I was sending again, to not leave my 'like' up for her interpretation. I felt good about it and I hope it brightened her day up a bit too. Maybe every picture deserves a text instead of a like, or maybe only some do, but I do at least know you'll all start seeing my name on your phone screens more and on your notifications tab less.
-kevin
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Welcome to Good Burger
Hey there. My name is also Chris. I am not a musician, though. In fact pretty far from one. I do however own a banjo. And can play Rockband bass on hard. So maybe I am a musician...
Anyway, welcome. When Kevin sent me the text yesterday that he was starting a blog I was actually excited for a couple of reasons. 1) I realized I was one of Kevin's 5 smartest friends. And 2) I ran a few sites back in my day, but never anything that was taken seriously by the masses. I'm hoping we can accomplish that here at "Blog So Hard".
My main focus on the site will be sports, however I like how Kevin mentioned that he doesn't want anyone to be confined to just a few topics. Maybe in music I'll talk about my experience at that Avril Lavigne concert I went to. Or for TV I can just talk about how I watch TBS for basically 5 hours straight. Or for video games I can bring up that I haven't played any game seriously besides any of the members of the "NHL" franchise. Or maybe I'll just stick to sports...
In all seriousness I thank Kevin for giving me a platform to voice my opinions: a place where no one can see my face. Hopefully this blog takes off so I can have a legitimate reason to drop out of school (after we sell it to Google for billions, of course). But if that doesn't happen, I hope at the very least that our readers don't feel like they are dumber for visiting our site.
Peace and love.
- Chris G.
Anyway, welcome. When Kevin sent me the text yesterday that he was starting a blog I was actually excited for a couple of reasons. 1) I realized I was one of Kevin's 5 smartest friends. And 2) I ran a few sites back in my day, but never anything that was taken seriously by the masses. I'm hoping we can accomplish that here at "Blog So Hard".
My main focus on the site will be sports, however I like how Kevin mentioned that he doesn't want anyone to be confined to just a few topics. Maybe in music I'll talk about my experience at that Avril Lavigne concert I went to. Or for TV I can just talk about how I watch TBS for basically 5 hours straight. Or for video games I can bring up that I haven't played any game seriously besides any of the members of the "NHL" franchise. Or maybe I'll just stick to sports...
In all seriousness I thank Kevin for giving me a platform to voice my opinions: a place where no one can see my face. Hopefully this blog takes off so I can have a legitimate reason to drop out of school (after we sell it to Google for billions, of course). But if that doesn't happen, I hope at the very least that our readers don't feel like they are dumber for visiting our site.
Peace and love.
- Chris G.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Welcome To The Mothership Connection
No, I'm not in a rock band.
Well... I did perform in a few pop-punk shows, but it is certainly not my specialty. I'll be writing about my experiences gaining a reputation in the music industry as a musician who cares about music, and not necessarily about being the most famous person on the face of the earth. I love meeting and connecting with people legitimately, and gaining something from the experiences. Perhaps you'll join me and learn a thing or two as well.
The other half of me is owned by Google. I admire how they do business, I can't get enough of the products, and I love how they push technology to expand and grow.
Put these two things together and you'll see an interesting point of view of how technology can further music and maybe even some stories about music in technology.
My fellow bloggers have at the very least a listening prospective of music, but hopefully I can shed light on the other, sometimes not so glamorous side of it.
Hope you... can read.
-CSB
a warm welcome
As advertised, this is your warm welcome to our humble page. My name is Kevin to those who don't know, and I found myself on this blog because one day I decided I have a whole lot of opinions about a whole lot of things that hardly matter, so this is the place they're getting dumped. Whether you're reading out of pity, boredom, or the off chance you're actually interested, I hope you get a kick out of my rantings and ravings. I'm also lucky to be joined here by a few of my good friends who have the difficult task of bringing up the quality of the writing on the page, so thanks to all of them as well. We hope that all of us blogging together will give you all the opportunity to hear multiple takes on similar topics, as well as some very different topics being discussed at the same place.
I hope to float around all sorts of topics in my posts, but I'll likely focus on sports, video games, and music. I don't want to confine anyone writing on the page to just a few topics, so I'm sure the occasional color piece will crop up, but you'll know what you're getting for the most part. I also hope to avoid writing review blogs - I've seen enough shitty movie and music review videos on youtube for a lifetime, so my writing will more likely be geared towards comparisons and opinions regarding a larger picture, not reactions to content in single albums or games. My sports writing will probably be more about historical comparisons and fantasy advice than game summaries, and my gaming columns will likely be more about the debate over classic games versus today's games or something of the sort than rating the new Halo. You get the drift.
Anyway, welcome aboard. I hope since you've taken the time to read you'll consider coming along for the ride with us and at least hear what we have to say once in a while if not religiously. We're some interesting guys with some even more interesting opinions, so you might even learn a thing or two.
-Kevin
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